questions

There is never a dull moment when you are working with kids. My day includes everything from scraped knees to screaming tantrums to uncontrollable giggle fits, and these things happen in every age bracket! I get asked every possible type of question from “Why do gringos (us Americans) always take pictures of our feet? (A really good question, who knows?!) to What does the word circumcised mean? and everything in between and all around. I don’t mind it. It’s usually pretty interesting, especially because it shows a little glimpse into their mind and how they are growing up so fast.

Yesterday I was honored to have an incredibly deep and intellectual conversation with Solimar. She may only be in 3^rd grade but her mind works in ways that far surpass her age. The conversation started about God and His angels and how the devil came to be. We talked about Adam and Eve and the beginning of the Earth. Then we talked about this skit that they have seen a couple times in chapel. In the skit God creates his people and gives them all crowns but the devil comes and convinces them that the crowns do not make them special and unique but instead the opposite, it makes them all the same. The devil though can offer them the gift of a mask that makes them each individuals and different. The people fall into the tricks of the devil and accept the masks in return for their crowns. Once they have the crowns on though, they cannot remove them and are held captive by the devil. Of course Jesus comes and conquers the devil but the deal is made that the people can have their masks removed and once again receive their crowns from God only if they ask for them. It represents our Christian walk and how we are all trapped in sin but if we simply ask, God will forgive us and give us back our crown and place in His kingdom. So Solimar and I were talking about this, mostly her asking question, me answering them in the best way I knew how. We talked about salvation and how we need Jesus, we talked about how He is the only way to get to Heaven and then we started talking about the end of the world. We talk about what the Bible says will happen at the end of times, what is happening now and how they coincide. But the part of the conversation that struck me the most was what she said next. We had talked about how because we are Christians we have no reason to fear the end of the world. We know that God is going to protect us and that we will be safe in a beautiful place when life as we know it here is over. As we were talking about that though she paused and she looked at me and said, “There is only one thing that I’m afraid about though. My mom.” You see Solimar’s mom died a little over 3 years ago. Her fear is that she doesn’t know what her mom believed. She doesn’t know if she believed in God, or if she believed in Jesus, or what happened to her in her death. I sat there trying to swallow the lump in my throat. What deep thoughts and a heavy weight this little girl carries. We talked about how we just have to trust in God and know that He will take care of us and that is what we have to believe in to carry us through, that we don’t know what happened to her mom, but that it’s our responsibility to make sure no one else has to ask the same question about their mom.

We talked a bit longer, and then slowly switched from one topic to another ending on something completely unrelated, but my mind still couldn’t let go of the look in her eyes when she said, my mom. Conversations like this make me surer of my faith in so many ways, but at the same time it brings up so many more questions. Like exactly that, how can you not only let a mother and daughter be separated in life, but death too? and Why can’t everyone just live happily ever after in a perfect world? These questions are ones that won’t have answers in this life time, but I simply have to trust. I have to know that my GOD is bigger, and He’s worth it. He’s worth not knowing the answers and He’s worth spending an eternity with without a second guess. It just makes our mission even greater. It makes my mission more intense. I don’t want to have to ask that question about a friend or loved one, I want to know that when I die and go to Heaven, there is going to be a rockin’ party and everyone I love will be there.